Vent-Axia Automatic, Crypt on the Green, Clerkenwell, London

Vent-Axia Automatic

Is this thing listed? Can dryers be given ancient monument status? This dryer harks back to simpler times, when men and women would empty their night-soil out of the window onto the heads of the rag-covered peasants below, before turning to dry their hands on their newly installed automatic Vent-Axia. It’s always interesting to see supposedly white components yellow at different rates. All of the retro, with none of the ‘ooh look, chrome and curved lines’ – pretty terrible overall.

Rating: 1

World Dryer A48/DA548 Push Button – Tenpin, Plymouth

World Dryer A48/DA548 Push Button

This manual hand dryer boasts a high air pressure with a warm temperature. It is more than sufficient to dry the hands quickly, which is good as the warm air turns too hot after a few seconds. However, this particular World Dryer A48 has an excessively long duration – a full 30 seconds, when timed – so it will not be winning any environmentally friendly awards any time soon.

Rating: 3

World Dryer Smart Dri – The Abbey Inn, Buckfast

World Dryer Smart Dri

This dryer and I do have some history. This particular World Dryer Smart Dri is fitted in the men’s room of my amiable local. You may have noticed the retro-fitted PVC tiles beneath the unit. These cover – if I remember correctly – a large, brown, crusty, dried waterfall of patrons’ hand-excrement that runs down the wall. The unit itself is powerful enough, automatic but takes a long time to heat up and cuts out several seconds before dryness is achieved.

Rating: 2